a very long non-knitting, work related rant

Each day I go to work, and wonder, do I really like this job?  The answer can be complicated.  
One aspect of my job that never really bothered me in the past but now drives me bonkers is the endearing (NOT) behaviour of our customers.  
We have two cake sizes and about 12 flavors of cakes and tarts in our case.  Our case is about 5 feet tall, and I am about 5 foot 4.  I can't see through the glass at the back to the glass at the front.  Now here is a typical situation.  Customer comes up and from 3 feet away says, what kind of cake is that (did I mention the signs with cake name and price next to each cake).  They are pointing and I can't tell what they are pointing at so I ask which cake.  They say the one with the fruit on it.  I tell them it's a fresh fruit cake.  They ask the price (did I mention the sign???).  I tell them.  They say can I have that one (again with the pointing).  I say which size, large or small.  They ask, which is the large.  Now on a good day I say the one on the front row, on a crappy day I say the larger one is the large, and the smaller one is the small (I used to ask if they wanted the 6 inch or the 9 inch, but that just confused the heck out of all of them, did I mention tha the sign gives the size!!!!).   Now sometimes this is the end of the transaction, other times when I get out to hand them their lovely boxed cake, I get:
I don't like that one, I want an different one
can you write "happy 20th birthday john dick and harry" on a 6" cake in flaming violet, or better yet can you fit all that on a 3" diameter cookie
can you get me the smaller one, that is too large (or can you get me the larger one, that is too small)
can you put extra______ on it, why is that an extra charge
What spawned this today?  I had a customer call to complain about a cake.  She had gotten a different flavor than she asked for (I will admit we have screwed up a cake or two, but usually not that badly).  She said the team member that took her order "spoke really bad english" and she didn't think they understood what she said.  Now the woman who called was obviously not a native english speaker, so that bothered me (pot, meet kettle).  She wanted something (I didn't ask her what), and mentioned that her cousin worked for my company and told her the rules.  I asked her to return the cake I would check it out.  She said no one liked it so she threw it away.  Now to some this may seem like a reasonable story.  The me this screamed they ate the cake, she told her" cousin" (or the little voice in her head) she wasn't happy with it, her cousin told her to come back and get whatever she wanted in return.  It was the next day, not the day of the cake pick-up.  I told her that since she waited so long I couldn't really check her story and it would have been helpful if she had called the same day.  Well, I talked to the team.  They told l me she didn't place the order, her husband did.  And he ordered the fruit cake first then changed it to cappuccino.  We gave her a cappuccino.  We also had to fix the spelling of the kids name, because the guy misspelled it, twice!!!
This just bothered me.
The other thing that bothers me is when did "would you like your bread whole or sliced" become a yes or no question, or require so much thought?
*sigh*