As I sit here, I have just waved goodbye to Artemis (my 98 Saturn). She is on her way to the repair shop, where I am pretty sure they will discover I need a new clutch (and that I need to be relieved of about $800). I live about 20 miles from my job, so this of course (in my eyes) presented a major problem. These aren't 20 "hey, catch a bus to the subway to the bus" miles, this is 20 "hey, get on rt 1 to rt 100 to I95 to the beltway to rt 29" miles. Now normally I don't ask for help. I am not sure why, maybe it's because I want to be seen as strong and independent. Let someone need help, they can ask me, and I will go out of my way, bend into pretzels, to help them. When I need help, I figure the answer will be "no", or there will be complaints or comments (why can't you do it yourself), so I don't ask. I have trust issues, I admit it. Well, I did ask for help. I asked my sister if I could borrow her car, and on the week days ride into work with her. She said let's come up with a plan. I still feel like I am imposing on her. But I guess that is what sisters are for.
On another note, I have been thinking that I need to find my happy place. It's buried in the clutter of my life and I think it needs some sunshine, fresh air and fertilizer to revive it.
So, to that end I need to remember what brings me joy, and makes me happy. The thing for today is the joy of being with my family, having a good meal and great conversation. My middle sister took my mom, my oldest sister any me out to dinner last night (Christmas present) at McCormick and Schmick's ( I am sure that is spelled wrong). We had a great dinner, and just a simply marvelous time. Mom was on her best behavior. It was so much fun. Family can be good.